Encouraging competition and achievement is the cornerstone upon which western societies are built and as a result our fear of failure is frequently the biggest obstacle that we face when embarking upon new challenges .
However, every psychological study of enhancing success says that if you want to help people gain confidence and succeed you need to focus on their efforts, not the results and that being prepared and equipped to fail or to make mistakes is the only way that we can learn, develop and succeed as individuals. Of all the things that are taught in school, how to fail, possibly the most important lesson in life, is rarely included in the curriculum.
I am often the first person with whom my patients share significant and intimate thoughts and memories; I never take that privileged position for granted nor the opportunity to help someone to feel better about themselves and discover a more fulfilling life. One of my colleagues once described me as a natural psychologist; I guess she was alluding to the fact that I feel at ease being a therapist, I can empathise with people’s distress and discomfort but don’t feel overwhelmed by it, I can understand their problem and know how to help, it has always just felt like what I should be doing.