When we are faced with something new or unfamiliar our threat or fight/flight response kicks in. We have evolved to respond in this way, it’s a survival strategy, if we aren’t sure what awaits us, nature believes it is best to expect and prepare for the worst: In the days when we might have found ourselves foraging for food, if
The majority of us get anxious over exams and receiving exam results can be just as nerve wracking. Here are three things you can do when your child doesn’t get the grades they wanted. Actively Listen Active listening is a skill using both verbal and non-verbal signs of listening. Such as positive reinforcement, summarising and clarification, maintaining eye contact, mirroring
It is estimated that in the UK alone there are 80,000 children suffering from Depression, that equates to about 4% of children. In this blog I am going to go through what treatment for these children involves. Unfortunately, there is currently no good quality evidence indicating what the best treatment for children with depression is. So, I am going to
Low mood in children is often dismissed as a passing phase, sometimes as just part of growing up. However, the National Institute for Clinical Excellence estimates that in the UK alone 80,000 children suffer from depression, 8,000 of those are under 10. Depression is not a problem that will just go away on its own. Here are the signs
In this blog I am going to describe 5 tips for dealing with exam stress and a 6th tip if you are a parent reading this trying to help your child. The first thing to remember is that a certain amount of anxiety and stress in the lead up to exams is normal and necessary. Nature has designed us to
In this blog I am going to describe a 10-step plan to tackle bullying. 1. Work Closely with your Child’s School Sooner Rather than Later The sooner you can start working with the school to stop your child being bullied the better. This may seem like an obvious thing to say but bullying is often a contentious issue and
Anxiety is common in childhood and, as parents, you are the best resource your child has to get through it. Here are 5 things you can do straight away to support them. 1. Remind them they’re not alone Remember going through something difficult as a child and feeling like you were the only person in the world this was happening
How To Spot Cyberbullying And What To Do About It With the recent advances in technology and the internet, bullying has been taken to a whole new level. Kids, teens and adults are all prone to being cyber bullied via social media channels and websites. Cyberbullies are just the same as regular bullies, except it can sometimes feel even scarier
Pokémon Go launched in the UK last month, and with more downloads than Tinder and more average daily users than Twitter, it’s safe to say the world has been taken over by pocket monster hunters. With GPS tracking – to play the game – Pokémon Go requires you get out and about. On your travels Pokémon appear at random with
Being a calm, laid back parent is something that most parents aspire to. We all realise that we are the architects of our children’s personalities, the single biggest influence on them. And it is not just the things that we plan to teach them that they learn from but from every single thing that we say and do. Children are
When we sleep our brains process what has happened to us during the day. New experiences (good and bad) present challenges that require additional processing, so dreams are often more vivid following an eventful day. Children’s lives are full of new experiences which makes them much more prone to vivid dreams and nightmares than adults. Therefore, the first thing to
In the first part of this blog we look at what not to do when helping your child to deal with anger and how to teach them to reduce their anger to a more tolerable level. 1. What not to do Anger is a strong (often overwhelming) emotion, so however inconvenient, embarrassing or frustrating it is when your child gets
Low Self Esteem and Confidence underpins the majority of mental health problems including anxiety, depression, eating disorders (inc. anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa and binge eating disorder), obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) and many behavioural problems. Couple this with the fact that most mental health problems develop before the age of 18 years and the importance of helping your child to deal
1. Don’t Minimise Their Anxiety Anxiety is an evolutionary response to a perceived threat, therefore if your child is suffering from anxiety it is because they believe that they are at risk from harm, so even if you do not share this perception, you must take theirs seriously. Minimising how they feel, telling them not to ‘be silly’ or trying
Encouraging competition and achievement is the cornerstone upon which western societies are built and as a result our fear of failure is frequently the biggest obstacle that we face when embarking upon new challenges . However, every psychological study of enhancing success says that if you want to help people gain confidence and succeed you need to focus on their
Dear Dr Gray, My son has recently started saying that he doesn’t want to go to school. When we get to school he doesn’t want me to leave him and cries when I do. I have tried being nice to him, I have tried getting cross with him, nothing seems to work. He has always been quite anxious and not
Young People and Counselling It is easy to assume that it is only rigours and demands of adult life that can lead to mental health issues that would benefit from CBT counselling and other forms of support. However, recent studies into the mental health of young adults at university and their access to counselling support, together with significant Government funding
Bullying is an experience that is not limited by age, whether you are in the playground or at work if you suffer from low self esteem and confidence you are vulnerable. A bully will only target those that they perceive will accept the bad treatment and abuse, have you ever heard of a confident assertive and self assured individual being
The foundation of our self esteem and confidence and therefore our mental health lies in our early childhood experiences and so therefore with our parents. It is through the explicit and implicit messages that they give us that we develop the beliefs about ourselves, our value and capacity and what to expect from other people and the world, which form
Excitement can become addictive. For example, some researchers are concerned that children’s use of video games, particularly those that involve aggression, may be over stimulating the dopamine drive system. Each time the children score or a make a hit, their brains may be receiving little bursts of dopamine that stimulate their nervous systems. If you over stimulate the nervous system,
Encouraging competition and achievement is the cornerstone of capitalism and the foundation upon which western societies are built and as a result our fear of failure is frequently the biggest obstacle that we face when embarking upon new challenges. However, every psychological study of enhancing success says that if you want to help people gain confidence and succeed you need
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