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Marriage Counselling & Relationship Therapy
Our intimate relationships provide us with a sense of balance, peace and emotional
wellbeing. If these are compromised, it can have a negative impact on every part of our
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Who is it for?
You may be finding it increasingly difficult to talk to each other, maybe you cannot agree on anything and are constantly bickering and arguing. Maybe you are finding it difficult to trust each other or just feel that there is no longer any warmth or closeness in your relationship. Maybe you have children and are concerned about the impact that your relationship is having on them?
Couples Counselling is for couples wanting to resolve their difficulties, improve their relationship and recapture what existed between them when they first met.
A Recent Testimonial
“My husband and I came to see Venetia when we were at absolute crisis point in our marriage. We both felt committed to making it work but neither of us were at all able to see a way forward – to the point where we were unable to live together or spend very much more than an evening together without arguing. Venetia immediately helped us with practical advice, techniques and exercises to help us through that most difficult time. As we progressed we completely trusted her to develop a schedule of therapy for us as both a couple and individuals. We have found her approach very balanced and even handed – she is compassionate yet firm all in one. Without her guidance through this difficult time I struggle to see how we would have found a way through on our own – we are now back living together and looking forward to the future.”
How It Works?
Step 1You and your partner will meet with one of our Psychologists for an initial session. This will last between 50-90 minutes (you can decide this prior to the meeting). During this session both you and your partner will be asked in turn to outline the problems that have brought you along to the session, your goals for counselling, the potential obstacles to these goals and any worries or concerns that you have about the process. During this initial session your Psychologist will also give you some initial information about what you can expect from the therapy.
Step 2It is the work that you do outside of sessions that will make the biggest difference to your relationship. Based on your initial session, your psychologist will set you and your partner some tasks to complete before you meet again. Tasks may include keeping detailed records of misunderstanding or arguments, diaries of your thoughts and feelings, listening to a recording of your counselling sessions and practicing specific techniques to reduce unhelpful behaviours.
Step 3Following your initial joint counselling session with your partner you will each meet individually with the Psychologist so that they can gain a better understanding of what you each contribute to the relationship and to give you the space to explore and discuss the issues you face without your partner present.
Step 4Your Psychologist will then meet with you both and present a detailed formulation and treatment plan that will explain why you and your partner are experiencing difficulties and what you can do to change this.
Step 5Over the course of the next 10-15 sessions (this is the average minimum number of session) your Psychologist will guide you and your partner through the process of making these changes using a combination of joint and individual sessions and homework tasks.
Step 6Once you and your partner are satisfied that you have created a happier and more fulfilling relationship for yourselves your Psychologist will offer you a number of follow up sessions to help you to secure these changes and tackle any teething problems.
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All of our Psychologists offer Marriage and Relationship counselling, click here to view the team.
What Sort of Relationship Problems Warrant Help?
We spend the majority of our adult lives in an intimate relationship and such relationships not only have the potential to make us happy and protect us from loneliness but research has shown that they improve our physical and mental health. In addition to this a two-parent family is the most successful context for raising children. However, along the way we all encounter obstacles to accessing these benefits and it is not always possible to overcome these without outside assistance.
When you and your parent find yourself stuck in a cycle of angry exchanges, where the same grievances are met by the same rebuttals, when resentment and frustration is found where once there was love and kindness, support from a third party, experienced in resolving relationship problems and restoring harmony and collaboration could be useful.
Why do Relationship Problems Occur?
The closer and more intimate we are with someone the more exposed our insecurities become. Our doubts about ourselves, other people and the world are more easily triggered when our emotions run high and this is never more so than when we are interacting with the people that we love. We act in ways with those closest to us that we would never dream of with those with whom we have less of a connection, so our partners inevitably see the best and worst of us. When something unsettles us, be it an external (e.g. financial pressure, work stress) or internal influence (e.g. low self esteem/confidence), the impact is first felt in our relationship and by our partner. Any number of things can lead to the deterioration of an intimate relationship, the specific trigger is however often less important than what the individual partners bring to the relationship; their core beliefs, responses and communication styles.
How Common are Relationship Problems?
This is hard to measure as there are only statistics available for marriages that end in divorce (nearly half of all marriages end in divorce according to The Office for National Statistics), however common sense suggests that relationship problems are the rule not the exception, how we respond to these is what separates those relationships that endure and those that do not.
What Treatment is Available for Relationship Problems?
Enlisting the help of a third party with the relevant training and experience can help a couple to step back from their problems and consider alternative ways of dealing with these and of interacting with each other in ways that will enhance the quality and longevity of the relationship.